Proverbs 31:22-23

²² She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

She is a seamstress and makes beautiful tapestry, bedding, comforters, big fluffy down quilts, adorable blankets that coordinate and pull the room together.  She is dressed in the finest.

Have you ever ran out of the house quick, something came up as you were in the middle of a paint job and you ran into someone and about die that they are seeing you like that.  When you meet up with your husband for a little lunch get together, do you make sure that your attire sends the right message.  The people he works with, will have ideas and set expectations even on things besides his performance.  What message does your appearance send to them?  Some people have an idea that it is more spiritual to dress down and if someone dresses in modern, up to date clothing that they are showing pride or trying to say ‘see what we make’.  You can not make that assumption.  This woman wore the finest but we also know that she gave to the poor and she did not take care of herself and make sure she looked good but her family suffered.  Is it wrong to schedule a pedicure and manicure if your budget does not allow it–yes but is it wrong to get a manicure or pedicure-no. It is not the act that is wrong.  Wearing a certain designer is not wrong–wearing a certain designer to pretend like you can afford things while your family goes into debt and can not afford food or make your payments is wrong.  Many people say Money is the root of all evil and that is not true.  God blessed Solomon with great riches.  The verse says the LOVE of money is the root of all evil.

We make assumptions all the time.  I bet as you look through these pictures you have an initial thought of each one and everyone would have different ideas about each one.

What does not only our attire but our facial expressions say about us?

Now–What is the big deal with all the purple in this chapter?

“The purple was manufactured by the Phoenicians from a marine mollusk (shellfish). The shell was broken in order to give access to a small gland which was removed and crushed. The crushed gland gives a milky fluid that becomes red or purple on exposure to the air. Piles of these broken shells still remain on the coast at Sidon and Tyre” (The International Standard Bible Encyclopaedia, Vol. IV, p. 2509). Purple was prized by the ancients and exported far and wide. “Great labor was required to extract the purple dye, and thus only royalty and the wealthy could afford the resulting richly colored garments” (Unger’s Bible Dictionary, p. 904). A total of 250,000 mollusks was required to make one ounce of the dye, which helps us to understand how valuable this dye was (Nelson’s New Illustrated Bible Dictionary, p. 288). Purple cloth was used in the furnishings of the tabernacle (Exodus 25:4), in Solomon’s temple (2 Chron. 2:14; 3:14) and in the high priest’s dress (Exodus 25:4; 26:21).  It was a royal garment worn by kings (Judges 8:26).  It was a symbol of luxury and wealth, worn by the rich man of Luke 16:19 and by the luxurious harlot woman of Revelation 18:16.  In Mark 15:17,20 our Saviour was mockingly dressed in purple when a kingly robe was put around Him.  Lydia was a seller of purple (Acts 16:14). purple dye

²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

Her husband sat at the City Gate–this is where the high officials of the city sat to discuss business and the city’s business.  People would gather at the city gate to hear what was going on, they didn’t have a tv or radio to get the news.  They might hear a judge talking about a trial that took place and the decision made, a new rule might be in place for handling a situation.  You would have people in rankings like Seanators or Congressmen.  Her husband was held in high esteem.  When he spoke people listened.

Part of the reason that he is in the position he is in and is well respected is because of his wife.  You know the saying–behind every good man is a good wife.  So to some degree–he can thank her for his status–not that he doesn’t desire some of the honor but it is also because of her that he is so well respected.

I thought this was interesting: Webster

By age 31 he had become known as one of America’s most effective speakers. One of  Webster’s earlier biographers, Norman Hapgood, assigns much of the great orator’s success to the quality of his marriage to a woman, Grace Fletcher, whom he married at the age of 26.  Of her the writer says:

She had the goal of keeping alert to those high principles which her husband held.  Her upright New England faith and sweet loyalty must have been one of the strongest barriers resisting the temptations which lay before the impressionable statesman (Norman Hapgood, Daniel Webster, Boston: Small Maynard & C o, 1899, page 64).

When Grace Fletcher Webster died, Daniel remarried a year later.  The biographer said of Carolyn Roy, his second wife:

She brought him money and social position and nothing else that could be traced in his life.

Two  years into that second marriage it was said of Webster:

He steadily declined from a height at which his altering nature could no longer sustain itself.

Daniel Webster began overeating and drinking.  His spending habits soared out of control, and his moral life disintegrated.  By the end of his political life, the man once known for his great integrity had become typed as a political compromiser.  Tragedy mounted upon tragedy, and when he died, he was a beaten and bitter man.

How sad–the choices he made changed the course of his life and not for the better.  The lesson here is just because a man has achoeved great status if he marries a woman who brings him down, does not mean he will keep his status.

On a side note — it is so important for us to teach our children the importance of looking at the qualities in a person that they choose to be friends with and that they want to date.  If they are someone who they are just dating for fun and would never consider marrying, they need to walk away from the fun dating idea.  If your friends are not looked at as people with good character–what does that say about you.

What do people think of you?  I had a follower call me, about a week ago.  She was wanting to talk with me about an upcoming give-a-way.

This is how the beginning of our conversation went:

Cheri:  (picks up phone) Hello

Follower: (in her lovely Southern draw)  OH, my goodness–you don’t sound anything like I pictured

Cheri:  Really what did you expect

Follower:   Your voice is deeper than I thought, you have a smokey voice.

Cheri:   I have a smokey voice?

Follower:  You know how you perceive someone to look and sound and I just thought you would have this higher pitched, bubbly voice, and now I am going to have to change my perception of you.

(all of this was so interesting to me–for one I have never been told I have a smokey or deep voice-not even by my husband. The other thing that was so surprising to me–I have sang in competitions and sang in church and been hired for weddings and I have a high voice–well actually I have a wide range but I would be considered a HIGH SOPRANO)

So I hope my deep smokey voice didn’t change her perception of me in a negative way.

When people meet you do they say –WOW I want to know her better or do they say — Oh we would never get along in real life.  Do they look at your clothing and are they turned off because your attire and attitude portrays a message–this can go both ways–you can have something expensive on and portray an attitude that comes across as a snob but you can also wear humble clothing and not portray that same humble attitude and come across as better than others for making a sacrifice.  What do people think about you when they come to your blog–we all have perceptions about different blogs and the way they respond to an e-mail or the way they write a post.

I know someone, and every time I am around them, you get this message that they are better than everyone else because of the decisions they have made for their family and because someone else has not been called to the same things–well they just haven’t arrived at the same spiritual level — that is so wrong.  It would be wrong for me to conform to something unless God places that on my heart just as much as it is for  me to shove that down someone’s throat.