If you need to start on chapter 1 you can go {HERE} to get all caught up.

Continued from Chapter 7
Fertility treatments really take their toll on you–counting every day of the month, the emotional toll, plus the physical side effects that come with it. It had been 5 years since I had been pregnant and nothing had worked. I needed a break –I needed some time off of fertility drugs, time to just enjoy my husband, time to not think about what day of the month it was and so we made the decision to stop fertility treatments for 6 months. We decided we would not talk about it for 6 months. After 6 months we would decide if we were going to do the next stage of fertility treatments or look into adoption and so we began our “fertility vacation” but 5 months into the vacation…

Chapter 8-Would This Do The Trick

5 months into our fertility vacation I asked my husband a question.

It was a Saturday morning and we were getting ready to go have a bagel and coffee before we ran some errands. The question had been running through my head all week. If you have ever gone through infertility you know what I am saying– You can drive yourself crazy with all of the questions that run through your head. Some people take haycations (a vacation out on a farm) others do staycations (stay at home but go do all kinds of fun things as if you were on vacation) – well we were on a don’t think about having a baby for 6 months ‘CATION so I was breaking the “rules” by asking the question but I had to know if I was crazy or if I was on to something.

DEEP BREATH–

Me: “Hey Babe–I know we are not talking about babies but I have been thinking about something all week and I can’t get it out of my head.”
Hubs: “OK what is it?”
Me: “I ‘ve just been wondering if there is a natural source that might help us out. Maybe there is something that my body is lacking that is causing all of this. After all many meds begin with plants.”
Hubs: “That is really amazing because I have been thinking about that all week too but I was thinking maybe there was something I could take.”

Isn’t God good? He had planted the same thought–a little seed and had allowed it to grown in both of our hearts and minds.

I love that verse–“Be still and know that I am God”

I am an extrovert and unfortunately I am not still and quiet many times. God doesn’t scream in my ear–I have to be quiet and listen to His still calm voice.

That was the extent of our conversation that morning. We finished getting ready to leave.  I think we were both thinking –this might be something to look into after next month when the “cation” is over.

We headed out the door and headed for the brand new bagel shop in our town. As we pulled into the strip center my husband said “Oh look there is a brand new GNC in here. Let’s go in and look and see what they have.”

I was thinking something different than a GNC but OK we can go in. We walked in and there was just one young single guy working. I asked him a few questions about fertility and the poor guy turned 14 shades of red, pushed their big huge book towards me and said “here you go, you can look up anything you want in there.”  That was the best thing that could have happened because I could look and search every question in my head and not feel like I was bothering him.

I searched ‘fertility’ and ‘infertility’. I read about different herbs and vitamins which lead me to look at other herbs and vitamins.  I asked him a few questions and determined what items might be helpful for me. Over the years I had asked my doctor a lot of questions so I knew a lot about what they believed to be wrong. The problem was the fertility drugs weren’t taking care of the problem. I also had a good friend who worked for one of the fertility doctors in town. She had shared a lot of info with me about what happens to you reproductive system when you are on fertility drugs. I walked out of GNC with a little sack of some vitamins and herbs that day. (Let me add if you are looking for herbs I would highly recommend going to a more natural source. I receive nothing for recommending this company but I have ordered from them and know they sell good products that are fresh–Mountain Rose Herbs)

6 weeks after purchasing that little sack of herbs and vitamins I once again wondered if this missed cycle meant I was pregnant. When you have waited so long 1day late has your heart clinging to the hope that maybe just maybe you are pregnant THIS time.   I purchased a pregnancy test and waited to see the results.

Until next time….